Some or probably most of you are thinking BB is too young and way to cute for this to be about her. Well I hate to break it to you, you’re probably correct.

Do you ever have those moments where something slips out of your mouth and before you know it your having to follow through with it? That’s what happened tonight. BB was more interested in playing at dinner than eating which isn’t new. D and I have really been trying to work on it and I am trying to make sure that I hold BB to a similar standard as D and I know D is following through on everything I say as well. Tonight she was getting ready to throw her food and before I knew it I said, “If you throw your dinner you’re going to bed.” Can you guess what happened next?

Yep, she threw it. And now she is in bed 20 mins earlier than normal which means we are in for probably an hour worth of fighting it now.

“How do I feel about this?” you probably weren’t thinking… Horrible!! No one warned me that enforcing rules was this tough, and she’s not even two!! Instantly I felt guilty for haphazardly throwing out a punishment, that probably was too harsh for the situation. Additionally, I felt guilty for cutting into BB and D’s time, and giving BB a punishment that she probably doesn’t understand. I really hope I get better at this rules/punishment stuff because if not I have a really long road ahead of me. Also at what point do you learn to hold your tongue or figure out the right punishment?

Also, do all punishments in some way or another punish the parents? Because I sent her to bed early I am now in for a fight to get her to actually fall asleep, more than usual, and then hopefully not but there is the chance of the fight all night and the really early morning I could be in for.

I do  realize my parents are probably laughing to themselves reading this and thinking revenge is so sweet. I also realize I am being pretty dramatic but I can’t help it. This is the first serious punishment I have been solely responsible for. This is my baby, she can do no wrong that isn’t fixed by a smile and a hug and yet I have to stick to my guns. I have to enforce this because at some point she’s either going to know I mean it or choose to not listen. I really hope this gets easier, I also hope D steps in as the bad guy for me.

I’m so grateful D stands behind me even if he doesn’t agree with my punishment or rule. I am grateful that we can communicate and discuss these things. I am also so thankful that D supports me during these rough patches, not only buy following through but by holding my hand and reasoning with me that it’s not the end of the world, and that BB is going to be fine.

I realize I have 16 or so more years of questioning every decision and punishment I make and I also realize that throwing food on the ground is trivial compared to what’s ahead but for my first baby step this went in no direction I was anticipating!